You Can Fast Forward Childhood, but You Can't Rewind It

This post is from a blog called STUFF CHRISTIANS LIKE that I really like :) I could really relate to this particular post. Right now I want to lock Liam in the basement right around the time he starts caring what other kids think of him. Don't call Family and Children's Services just yet. Jon is trying to loosen me up.

Enjoy...

#629. Raising Dorks
I don't have any hard data on this, but I think that of all the major world religions, Christianity has the highest dork per capita ratio. Did I say that right? Is there a different metric we're using to measure number of dorks that I should have referenced instead? Are we still rolling with the per capita ratio? It's so hard to find good research on this topic.

But think about it, no one ever says, "You know who is cheesy? Muslims." Rarely will you hear someone proclaim, "The Hindus are all uptight." And when Buddhists are stereotyped they're labeled as being "relaxed and peaceful." Christianity though has a lockdown on dork status and you know what?

I love it.

I used to hate it. From the time I was in the seventh grade right up until I became 33 I railed against it. I did everything I could to prove to the world that I was not some cheesy Christian. I distanced myself from Christian culture as fast as I possibly could because it all felt so overwhelmingly dorky. But then something weird happened, something unexpected ... my five year old tried to get into pop culture.

I've got nothing against the particular pop star my daughter suddenly became fascinated with but the transition from “I love the Wiggles” to “the Wiggles are for babies” was ridiculously fast. (In her defense, that Captain Feathersword who the Wiggles run with, scares me to death.) Up until that point I really hoped my daughter would grow up to be a cool kid. I wanted her to be part of the popular crowd at school and be considered hip. But when she started sweating pop stars and other little girls in our area started getting into teenage television shows, I had to pause.

Those things weren't created for a 5 year old. The entertainment she wanted to watch was not written for a girl two years out of diapers. It's got boyfriends and girlfriends and topics that are way out of her understanding as a little kid. And she might love it. She might sing all the songs and have a blast doing it and fit right in with all her friends. But if I encourage her to do that, if I push her toward that, I fast forward her through childhood. I speed her up from a 5 year to a 10 year old. And although I make about 47 dad mistakes a day, I have learned one secret about childhood:

You can fast forward childhood, but you can’t rewind it.

I wish I could but I can't. Childhood only goes one direction and I want her to stay a little kid for as long as she can. There will be plenty of time later for her to think boys are cute and interesting. (Right now I’m pushing for “smelly and cootie laden.”)

Until then though, she's not going to be hip. I'm going to raise a dork. Which is different from naïve, don't misunderstand, she's going to be like Matthew 10:16, shrewd as a snake and innocent as a dove. And if you're making different decisions with your kids, please don't hear this as an attack. I'm new to being a dad, am by no means a pro, don't have all the answers and am really only writing about the two kids with my last name. Who will be dorks.

I hope I don't help create one of these sheltered Christian girls that just goes insane when they get to college, but I promise you that I'm going to do everything I can to keep my kids young, out of the loop as far as the world goes and maybe even dorky. And when my oldest daughter yells at me when she's 13 because she can't go to a party with a bunch of boys, who I know are going to try to kiss her, I'll show her this post. And she's going to yell some more, but at least I'll kind of look like I predicted the future, which is fun.

Hilar

Things I'm WANTING Lately...

This episode of "Things I'm Loving Lately" has been slightly altered as I can't keep my mind of this beautiful contraption I saw sitting on my Aunt Cindy's countertop:

THE KEURIG PLATINUM!


I know what your thinking - "Haven't you ever heard of a one cup coffee maker?" Yes, fancy pants, I have. But, I am not a super crazy coffee drinker. I like to have a cup or two every once in a while, but I'm not the kind of person that goes postal if I don't get my fix by 8am every morning. And, on top of that, when I do usually drink it I prefer decaf. Too much caffeine is no good for me. Trust me. My legs end up looking like a blurry whirlwind in a cloud of dust. Kind of like the roadrunner. Anywho, my hubby doesn't drink coffee at all. Well, low and behold, this little wonder had fair trade, organic, decaf K-Cups (what the individual filters of coffee are called), pumpkin spice K-Cups, tea K-Cups (including chai - yum), and even hot chocolate K-Cups! Mark my words. I'm gonna get me one of these if it's the last thing I do... Now how to convince the hubz...

Labor Day Sale!!!!

I know I've been an absolutely atrocious blogger. Don't even start. Just admire my use of alliteration instead :)

I have many, many crafty and creative friends and one of them is holding a sale today at her etsy store! Her name is Jenny and her shop is called Liberty and Lace. She makes the cutest hair pieces for girls of all ages. My fave is this one:


(Lois and Clark)

I have it. She even named it after my husband's favorite superhero :)

I also really love these too.


(Marianne and Colonel Brandon)


(Margaret and Mr. Thornton)

And if I had a daughter, you better believe she'd be sportin' one of these!


(Kate and Jack)

And for all you hairband and bow head fanatics out there (yes, I'm talking to you), there is something for you too :)

I am not an accessory kind of person. I'm lucky to remember my wedding ring. But these little pieces are so lovely and sweet, you just have to get one. Oh, and by the way, the sale is BUY ONE GET ONE FREE so you can get two!!!

Click here for more details. Happy Labor Day!

Things I'm Loving Lately

Sooooooo, I stole this idea from some friends. (Because I'm dreadfully unoriginal.) Every once in a while I will let you guys know what I am loving at that particular point in time. Hey, you never know. Maybe you'll love it too!



Theo Chocolate



One word....



yum! These people make chocolate the way a good vintner makes wine. It's serious.


And on top of that, they are doing something good!


At Theo Chocolate, we are changing the definition of “quality” by uniting creative excellence that results in deliciously award-winning chocolate with our unwavering commitment to changing the way the cocoa industry conducts business. At Theo, we believe there is no luxury in products that benefit us today, while jeopardizing future generations ability to meet their needs. When you taste our chocolate you will experience our passion and integrity in every luscious bite. We promise, there is something for everyone from the adventurous “foodie”, to those seeking the simple comfort of a delectably creamy milk chocolate bar.

We follow our passion for excellence to bring you chocolate that will delight your palate, ignite your imagination and inspire you to think and act sustainably! Be a part of our movement to save our planet and its capacity to nurture and sustain all living things. We can’t do it without you!

THEO CHOCOLATE
BECAUSE CHOCOLATE GROWS ON TREES

No additives, no preservatives, no artificial flavors, higher percentage of cacao, sustainable farming, fair trade beans, local US factory! Ummmmm.......guilt free chocolate on all accounts??? Yes please! Oh, did I mention how pretty it all is?






Jon and I took their factory tour in Seattle and you can learn more about them at www.theochocolate.com. Not only did I find the job of my dreams (a tour guide for an all organic and fair trade chocolate factory....holla!) I also tasted the chocolate....and I think I'm in love :)

I miss this...

and this...



but not as much as I missed THIS!

Andy Walks with Me...

We are on vacation with my family right now in sunny Santa Rosa Beach, FL (aka. heaven). As is typical with most family vacations, some slightly unusual and hilarious games, contests, etc... take place in our free time. When you are traveling with a small child who has to nap for 3 hrs a day and goes to bed fairly early, the free time is more abundant than usual so, therefore, things seem to get even more bizzaro than usual. Tonight we all engaged in a hand whistle contest inspired by Sara Evans' performance of God Bless America at the All Star Baseball Game. This contest lead to a YouTube search where we found these beauties....enjoy!





If this guy would have participated in our contest I would have a) asked him to pull his pants up a little more and b) had my butt kicked in hand whistling....fo sho.